A Brief Look Inside the Book
Hope in These Light Afflictions Day 1- Why Me?
*All week, we will be taking pieces of a devotional I wrote on marital infidelity, Hope in These Light Afflictions. The story is mine and shares many thoughts and feelings from that part of my life’s journey. While it was a season of incredible emotional pain, it also opened the door to becoming better acquainted with the Great Comforter. My prayer is that our story will point others facing similar pain to Jesus. Additionally, I pray that some of the things I learned through that period of time would be a help to even just one.
I am ordinary in every way, and nothing about me seems book-worthy. However, my credibility comes from my own journey through infidelity and its damaging effects. No one else could ever understand the associated feelings unless they, too, have walked this painful journey. I vividly remember, when I was in the darkness of the earlier days, how I longed to hear from others who had experienced a similar situation and had come through it and found peace and restoration. Those were stories that gave me much-needed hope.
You may wonder, like I did, why this is happening to you. There may not be clear answers today, but know this: God knew the path ahead and has been preparing you for this specific time in your life. I take comfort in looking back and seeing how God was strengthening me and exercising my faith through the circumstances He allowed into my life prior to the affair. Caring for my sick father-in-law in our home had been challenging; extra patience, grace and strength were required for the job at hand. The challenge of caring for him at times felt burdensome—even annoying—but God was using this situation to strengthen me for a much greater storm, calling me closer to His side.
Think back on your own life and see the touch of God’s Spirit, little by little, preparing you for this season.
It doesn’t seem fair—I get that. It’s aggravating, at times, to see other people carefree and happy when your life is caving in around you. You feel embarrassed and humbled by this betrayal. You may wonder why you weren’t good enough to warrant your spouse’s faithfulness. You will feel angry for the position you’ve been put in. You’ll be fearful and afraid of what your future may look like.
How did this happen to me?
Sweet friend, God knew ahead of it all that you would be in this place. He deeply cares and He still has good plans for you. If you allow Him to, He’ll bring good things from the pain and heartache of this season. Stop wondering why this happened to you and shift your questioning mind to this instead: how can God use me through this? You won’t find this answer right away; it’s likely to come weeks, months, or even years later. But if you’re willing to be used by Christ in this situation, your impact on others has great potential.
Use this season of heartache to strengthen your relationship with the Lord. Draw close to Him and tell Him all the thoughts and feelings of your heart. Don’t shut Him out; talk to Him every day and all through the sleepless nights when your mind is buzzing with worries and fears, anger and loss. He is listening, dear friend; but you must also listen. He will speak to you and instruct you in the ways you should go. Pay attention—He’s got this, and with Him, you will come through this fire.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11, ESV)
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. (Romans 12:12, ESV)