Hope in These Light Afflictions Day 2- I Need Hope
*All week, we will be taking pieces of a devotional I wrote on marital infidelity, Hope in These Light Afflictions. The story is mine and shares many thoughts and feelings from that part of my life’s journey. While it was a season of incredible emotional pain, it also opened the door to becoming better acquainted with the Great Comforter. My prayer is that our story will point others facing similar pain to Jesus. Additionally, I pray that some of the things I learned through that period of time would be a help to even just one.
The week following our initial separation was a dark and sad week. There was so much grief and heartache! I cried more tears than I thought possible—my body and face ached from grief pouring out of me. I sat on the couch for hours on end, not having any clue what to do with myself. I re-hashed the past year over and over again in my mind and felt emotionally wrecked and hopeless. And while people reached out with the loving care I needed, what I was desperate for more than anything else was hope. Hope that I would be okay. Hope that my marriage could be repaired and restored. And hope that God would help me with my broken heart and newfound loneliness.
I’ll always remember a text I received from my son in those first days of shock and grief. He sent me a video link to the song by Tauren Wells, All My Hope (is in Jesus). I can’t tell you how many times I listened to that song over and over again, grasping onto the words of hope in Jesus. I wrote down Scripture passages filled with hope—I craved it like our bodies crave fresh air!
Hope is a lifeline when you’re in the middle of your darkest days. Hope meant that I would make it through—one day at a time. Hope meant that maybe, just maybe, my marriage wasn’t over. Throughout this season, God poured hope into my weary and anxious soul through Scripture, song and the words of some dearly beloved friends.
If you need hope, know that our source is God, the giver of hope. With Him, all things really are possible—that truth is promised to us in Scripture. Pray hope-filled Bible passages back to Him; it reinforces the hope we read of and He loves hearing His Word spoken back to Him.
Marital conflict causes a great deal of insecurity and emotional trauma. When we are faced with the feelings that surround sexual betrayal, we feel desperate to escape them. Our situation may look incredibly bleak in the moment; some days it’s very difficult to look beyond this season and feel the hope our spirits long for. Allow yourself to rest in His faithful love for you and remind yourself, as often as needed, that He is a God of compassion and grace. He longs to heal you, yes, but He also longs to walk in this messy, painful season with you. He wants you to learn to lean on Him and rest in the hope He gives—whatever that may look like.
Hope does not rest on your circumstances or things looking the way you want them to look. Instead, allow it to rest on the unchanging character of Christ, in whom alone is found our eternal hope. The Christian is never without hope, for our whole being relies on the hope we have in His resurrection, and all it means to us as His child. Today may be messy. Tomorrow may borrow hurts from today. But our future is secure in the finished work of Jesus—that is our true hope, brothers and sisters. Never lose sight of that no matter what your situation today may be.
For you, O LORD, are my hope, my trust, O LORD, from my youth. (Psalm 71:5, ESV)
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope. (Romans 15:13, ESV)