The older I get the more I realize how many families are touched by pregnancy loss. It’s a very difficult situation that requires patience, understanding, support, a lot of love—and for the believer, prayer. Healing takes time, and to be honest, the hurt is always a part of you. This study was written for those who intimately know this loss or love someone who does.
(The Dream) “The hard reality is that God doesn’t promise us children, but what He does promise is to be with us no matter how hard our journey may be. This doesn’t erase our disappointment or heartache, but it does invite Him into those painful wounds of our hearts. Scripture makes this very comforting promise to us in Psalm 147:3: ‘He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.’ This is a promise we can cling to when life looks a lot different than we imagined.”
(Happy News) “I vividly remember waiting to share the news with my husband when he returned home from work that day. In my head, it was going to go a whole lot differently than it did. My husband’s response was somewhat lackluster; he had figured it would take a lot longer than it did. Was he excited? Yes. But he was also a little frightened at the enormous responsibility of having, providing for, and raising our own child. We celebrated and told all our tribe the wonderful news. Good things were on the horizon and I could hardly wait.”
(The Dream Shattered) “The days that followed were painful. My body hurt from the surgery, but my heart hurt more. God brought people into my life who knew how to help me through that difficult time. Whether they brought food, sent cards, prayed, or just sat in silence with me, I felt cared for by His people. If you see a need in your circle of people, don’t be afraid that you won’t know the right words to say. Words aren’t even necessary; a hug and a heartfelt ‘I’m so sorry’ will help encourage a hurting heart. Losing a pregnancy can feel a lot like losing hope.”
(A Time to Heal) “I had loved being pregnant, and my new reality of not being pregnant yet also not having a baby was a hard pill to swallow. Most of my closest friends already had children, and now I felt left out. I was still happy for those who were pregnant and expecting a child, but I simply was unhappy that I no longer was. When you miscarry a child, you experience grief in the same stages as anyone who loses a loved one. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance all come in some shape or form.”
(Renewed Hope) “Within six weeks, I became annoying—I know that now. I was desperate for a baby, and all romance flew out the window. Like a machine, I sought that golden (+) in the window of a pregnancy test. I took ovulation predictor tests, faithfully took my temperature via a basal thermometer, and was basically consumed with getting pregnant as quickly as possible. And I did.”
(The Waiting Game) “The next few months were difficult, but I felt encouraged by how God provided people in that season of my life who uniquely understood my situation. I felt a more intimate connection with my husband as we shared loss together and leaned on the Lord to help us through. I felt blessed as our family and friends sought to step into the emptiness we felt, and love us through it. God faithfully made His presence known to us and provided support and encouragement when we needed it most.”
(At Last) “Late in the afternoon, we got the ‘all clear’ for delivery—our son was ready to make his entrance. After a few hours of pushing and the help of a vacuum that gave him a cone-shaped head for a day or two, we welcomed Bennett Graham McDonald into the world! Even five weeks early, he was perfectly healthy and whole, and I began a lifetime of love, looking at that precious face. What a tremendous blessing it was to finally hold my very own child. Nothing in life can really prepare you for the joy of it, especially after the journey we took to make it to this moment.”